I am not alone ^^

First of all, salute to MJ - The greatest artist in the history, A terrific performance, A marvelous dancer , A charming man .. etc.

Human will only learn to appreciate after they lose something.
Totally agree. I never even pay a damn shit on MJ before.. and now I keep on listening to his hittest songs... =.=

Listening to the songs of MJ.. watching his performance via youtube made me realize that despite his bizarre appearance and his legendary life... His voice ,his dance, his moves are simply..fascinating.All these explaine why were his fans so crazy about him.

" You are not alone","earth song"," Black or White", those are the songs I recommand. my favourite was " you are not alone", the lyrics are simple,but yet ,it's so true and sincere that it can touch ur heart easily.

I use to feel so alone since I came back. Always lock myself up in the book of sea in order to confront that "exam monster". I noticed the changes that happened in me. I became less talkative.. and always... at least frequently think of the negative sites. I know why is this happening.I am too concern about my result, too worry about what father might think of me. I am afraid of being scorn by others , I wanna be the good one, at least one of the best. And last but not least, I simply just missed my friends.. I really really miss them so much. I can see myself smiling everytime I chat with anyone one of them through msn or facebook. I can feel myself more energetic everytime I saw a new mail in my mailbox.Chatting with them make me feel stressless.. Is like I am back to the previous time.. Back to Malaysia.. Back to Kwang Hua.. Back to S6...

I am not alone. I knew that. I always got a bunch of frenz as my supportation. What have I done in my prelife to got all of these caring,crazy,and faithful friends.. :P

Thanks frenz.....I love you guys.. I really do.. ^w^

On the process..

I've known all of my result. What a disappointment.
Again,didnt reach my satisfaction.
Miss Fung suggested me improve my writing skill.And,do something for my terrible grammer.
Ok Miss Fung, in the process now...

Oh ..ok my bad

Today after a tiring school program,I rush back home directly.
Ask father anxiously whether can I go for the Tram which held in church today.He began to talked bout my study(ARG! again!!),he was worried that I am wasting the study time of mine on those activity. To stop his tirades I imply that I would skip the sunday school,so that I may save some of my time on study.
Maybe he felt he was being offensive,he began to critisize on me,harshly.( well maybe he dint think so..) He said that I have been being rude to every elderly in our family,which has been quite a long term dissatisfaction. He claims that some of our elderly family members even complaint the bad attitude of mine to him.He said that I have been giving him reply in an insolent tone of voice for umpteenth times. He is getting more annoyed as he said and looks like he wanna slap me in anytime.
The tirades finally stop by calling me to introspect of myself.
Well,I really dont know he has been so suffering all these days.As he said he has show a great patient and generous on me and could not hold anymore longer.
I dont know my reply was such offensive as most of the time I am really just playing a joke.And I thought he was too!!
I dont know,I swear to god I really dont.Who wanna be scold and dislike by their parents? Am I like that kinda of retard who purposely get their parents mad at them and dont even bother to talk to them anymore?
I think daddy is really angry this time.As he call me to transfer all my blankets to grandma's room.Maybe next was to cut off all my activities.Oh god...anytime but not now....any month but not this month!!!
What am I going to do was,avoid any conversation with him.As he think that most replied of mine to him was offensive.Agree with what ever he said,and all the elderly said.Have to regain their support..At least stop their complaint.
This is what the grow up want.To be king and queen.To be dominant of their children.To have a firm grip of their innocent and inexperience child.To be obey and to be respect.
well then...life's like this......Nothing to lose,nothing to gain.

What the H*ll

All things came in a sudden.
Without any sign.
Without any trace.
Yesterday we are like joking around,discussing the silly drama show ; today I am like the one who assassinated ur beloved father , the one u most hate and dislike in the world.
Yesterday you are like defend for me in front of anyone ; today you are like saying " come one! there she is! Get her! " to everyone.
................
WHAT HAVE I DONE?
Is it something I did? Or is it something u said?
Am I not treated u good enough? For a friend who just known each other for not more then half a year? What are you expecting? Am I let you down ? Am I not reaching ur minimum requirement ? Am I not tolerable enough ? Am I not caring enough ?

Doing all those effort just hoping to receive your greeting without a bad word inside of it. Or at least will give me a smile when I say hello to you in the morning . Or perhaps one day you will call my name instead of calling bitch . Or maybe just agree with my word for once and stop trying to make sarcasm in every single point that i list out.

Am I too greedy for ordering so many wishes at a same time?
I know you are excruciating for the happening of some trouble in your life ; I know you are having a hard time in dealing with all of it,is easy to tell by your panda eyes ; I know u may ignore everyone's feeling while you are having problem in even dealing urs . But,do you need to do it that way? Are you thinking that by showing ur anguishness and acting like someone with schizophrenia will eventually win the caring of others?

Everyone desire happiness.
To gain happiness,you must learn to share your happiness with others ; thus people will in turn share theirs with you . On the contrary , making people feel bad will do nothing help but just creating a awful image of yours in other's heart.

Or this is just your special way in reaching jubilation? Who knows??

Invasion Of Lazyness

omg..omg.. omg..
Exam is juz around the corner,about two weeks from now and still I am here,laying on the bed,staring the ceiling,doing nothing.
I knew that i should get into study right a way,i knew i should dig myself into the world of books and cramp my brain with all the equation of chem,math...I know exactly what should i do..juz dont have the motivative to start doing anyone of them.
What will it be happening on the day of examing...what will it be look like of my result...what will it be speak out from dad...
I can not imagine..better say is..dont want to imagine...
well..better start study nw..to avoid the happening of domestic violence in the future...
mm..be4 that...better have a nap first....Resting is the preparation for walking a longer road...tats what people said!!! :p

First Enigma

Never thought I will be having my ownself blog.

Suggested by one of my best fren...and nw i am writing my blog de....how changeable a woman can be..

What am I going to share..frankly speaking,I have no idea.Once I am back to hk,is seems like,I am losing myself.Am becoming a dull,speechless,and gloomy girl.Dont know why is this happening.

I got to hang out with friends,went shopping,buy cloth,stuff which i am fancy on...watch movie,online till midnight..but...why am I feeling much loneliness than ever...

Maybe I just havent get use to the new lifestyle here........maybe I just havent get use to the people here......maybe I just missing my friends and family in malaysia......

Just Maybe..